Review: Never Have I Ever

Title: Never Have I Ever: My Life (So Far) Without a Date
Author: Katie Heaney
Format: egalley
Pub. Date: January 14th 2014
Source: Netgalley & Grand Central Publishing

★★★★★

Five stars.

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Never Have I Ever is the non-fiction tale of Katie Heaney that narrates her romantic life thus far- or rather, her lack there of. Humorous, honest, and more than a little sassy, Katie shares her ups and downs with dating, and shows an inside look at what a life of being single can be like. Come get acquainted with the boys she's mooned over from afar, the ones she almost kinda dated, and the friends and families who simply ask "Why don't you get a boyfriend?"

I'm going to be perfectly honest. What first drew my eye to this title was the cover. Look at it. It's adorable. It's pretty and I want to display it on my bookshelf. Upon reading the blurb, being a fellow inactive dater, I thought I'd have to check this out to see what others like me had to say. I was not disappointed.

The difference (well, the main one) between Katie and myself is that I am in a relationship- but it was one that was a long time coming. I didn't date much in high school or junior high. There were a few guys around, but they weren't very.... Dating-y? I know that's not a word. But there were no dates, no prom, no family introductions. My current relationship is the first of that kind. So, though I am committed, I related heavily to what this author had to say. Preach it, girl.

I love the amount of sarcasm, awkwardness, and sass that went into this book. Heaney's voice is genuine, whether she's telling a funny story or reflecting on a sadder point. We have very similar tones and senses of humor. So much so, in fact, that I read my girlfriend a few quotes, and she asked me if I wasn't entirely sure that I was the one writing this book. And there were a lot of quotes that I read. This book is pretty much all quotable. If that's not a sign of an enjoyable story, I don't know what is.

I also appreciated that though she has opinions, and makes no secret of them, that she remained relatively unbiased in her assessments. For example, there are a few chapters that narrate her experiences in online dating- something of which she's not overly fond. I braced myself for the worst of it, since I've met people this way and I know that a few rotten apples have spoiled the bunch, so to speak. But her experiences were so god damn accurate. This was the mood for the whole book, really. There were so many moments when I vocally (to the concern of Emily) said "You go girl!" or "Preach it!" or "Hell yeah Jonathan Taylor Thomas is fine!" Some books make you shriek about 90's stars and Lisa Frank diaries. This is one of them.

I feel like any female (or male for that matter) who has ever been down on their luck in love, whether it was for a few years or a lifetime, will relate to Katie and the life that she's penned down. This is the kind of book you should read with a glass or seven of wine, feet up, and one of those green face scrub mask things on your face. (Is that really what girls do? I thought 'come up with a girl's night in image', and that's what came up...) Long story short: it's funny, sweet, and an interesting look into what the dating scene means to those of us to whom men and women do not gravitate. Read it.

Thank you to Netgalley & Grand Central Publishing for the chance to read this, and to Katie for sharing her story with the rest of us. I need to find a physical copy of this, that's for sure.